WHO ARE THE AMPHIBIMEN?
Frederickville Gazette Exclusive!
Frederickville, USA – Town Marshal William Mavrick just looks away and frowns at the mention of the name.
“It’s just…abnormal,” he eventually mumbles. “I went into Law Enforcement to protect people from …PEOPLE. Not…” A pause.
His face tightens. “Not from frogs.”
And apparently not to be assisted by a vigilante team of amphibians, calling themselves the Amphibimen.
Readers may recall last month’s report of the Frederickville Mini-Mart robbery, which was unique as it was perpetrated by a knot of frogs and toads. They succeeded in subduing the employee on duty, Stephen Turner, 22, of the Southtown section, and making off with the contents of the register and the instant lottery cards behind the counter.
It was the serial numbers on these ‘scratch-off’ cards that led to the arrest of Dr Elizabeth Lendvai of Frederickville University, when they were found in her van two days later. Marshal Mavrick had responded to an early Saturday morning report of a woman dressed in a garish pink and lavender princess outfit, bound and gagged in front of the Frederickville Bank.
Further investigation found this woman to be Dr Lendvai. A note found with her said she had forced frogs to commit crimes for her, by using a ‘telepathic tiara’ and an ‘encephalo-septer.’ The note was signed, ‘The Amphibimen.’
Dr Lendvai contends that the Amphibimen are mutated frogs, presenting themselves as protectors of Frederickville and its surroundings. She also claims they are the creation of Dr Leopold Ranasen, a professor of herpetology at FU.
“Please don’t be absurd,” Ranasen commented on the allegations. “Who would possibly give credence to a story like that?”
Stephen Turner, the Mini-Mart employee and original victim of Lendvai’s ‘Bofu Troops,’ is more congenial to the idea of anthropomorphic amphibian adventurers patrolling in and around the city.
“After my encounter with the Bofu, I feel safer knowing the Greater Amphibiverse has a cosmic yin and yang,’ Turner said cryptically.
As for Mavrick, he still doesn’t like it.
“Frogs, lizards, and mudpuppies, all in capes, flying around the swamps fighting bad guys,” he said.
“Amphibimen. It’s just not normal.”
-Erik J Nielsen and Trystan Kurt Nielsen contributed to this story
“J.F.B.” – K. Torp